[ honestly he—

after baam's death, there was grieving of course. belated due to the nature of the tower and more of a rallying cry than anything else. some cried, some got angry but khun;he had work to do. he's processed baam's death in some ways and not in others, some parts of it still rubbing him wrong and raw.

if it was anyone else besides tatara looking at him like that, he would have gotten angry. he knows, because some people have tried and other people have gone a different approach, insinuating that his way of grieving was taking baam's girlfriend. those people lost their fingers and sometimes more.

it's even funnier in hindsight, as if he could ever be attracted to someone like rachel—he forces himself back into the now at the question, looks at his boyfriend and then gently leans in to touch their foreheads together. ]

No. [ he lets his eyes slide mostly closed. ] It didn't stop him, actually. If anything it might have motivated him more, because now he needed to be her legs. [ literally, metaphorically. ]

I could have told him, but...I wanted to protect him as much as I could. Even from myself. I know how I am, after all.